" $500,000 for this . I don't get it. But then, I haven't been getting it for 20 years. We can't sell daddy."

" Mom, when you say 'we,' I hope you mean 'oui,' as in French for 'Hell yes we'll sell daddy and colaborate with the Germans.' Ergo, which is French for 'Yes take our country but please let us live to make our creamy sauces,' I saw we take the $500,000 and bib daddy adieu, which is French for `A deer, a female deer.' So, in closing, I'd like to say one thing "S-E-L-L....Sell Daddy.""

" Dad, take a long hard look at yourself. You tell me what other possibility there is out there for a man made of fudge ......Snap out of it, man. Sell your worthless damn body and soul. It's better than selling shoes. At least, we'll finally be able to tell people what you do. You'll be Al Bundy, male hooker."